I Was An Alarmclock ~ The Life and Times of Lloyd

Last month I boycotted International Superhero Day.
I know that seems a little upside down, since I AM a superhero, but civilian me checked with superhero me, and we both agreed it was stupid to celebrate the holiday when all superheros ever do nowadays is fight among themselves and each other.

So technically, the boycott was a PARCHEESI movement.

Anywhoo, I still don't know what the ugly Hydra chip thing in my neck is, and neither does Batman. ..But this morning, it was beeping at me. Not just regular kind of beeping either- More like, "Hey, I'm a bomb" beeping.

Now, lacking the ability to die and being half asleep in bed, I merely anticipated being thrust into sitting position by the explosive force of a bomb detonating on the back of my neck.. I failed to acknowledge the fact that, even if I can not be fatally injured, I can still feel pain. I also did not consider that my bed was not bomb-resistant, and should the chip in my neck explode, it would set fire to my bed, which would soon catch the walls, and eventually burn my house down: Leaving me homeless and in my pajamas.

Thankfully, none of this actually happened.
As a matter of fact, the beeping ceased just as suddenly as it started.

Checking the time, it was like 9:00 in the morning. I consider this to be the time of day when you shouldn't actually be awake. More like roll over, see your room is light, take a deep contented breath, gratefully acknowledge how well you slept and how cozy your bed still is, then silently consider everything you have to get done today, and innocently drift back to sleep while so doing... This is not the time of day I think you just actually wake up at.

So, if this Hyrda chip is merely a glorified alarm clock that will see me relentlessly slapping the back of my neck every morning trying to shut it up, then no. I want it gone right now. Maybe it is a form of torture set to induce self hatred, or make you cautious of your own limbs- which at any moment could start blaring like an unstoppable car alarm.. I don't know.

Lloyd Out!